Being A Girl: A Brief Personal History of Violence

This is an incredibly difficult read. 50% of the population should not have to put up with this.
I’m not sure I can fully comprehend what happens to boys, that they can grow up to be the kind of men that perpetrate, deny, or turn a blind eye to the types of behaviours listed.
And in just writing that, I burn with shame for every time I chose to ignore the boorish behaviours of my own sex. For what? To “fit in”? Fear of becoming the target of their venom?
This shit’s gotta change…

The Belle Jar


I am six. My babysitter’s son, who is five but a whole head taller than me, likes to show me his penis. He does it when his mother isn’t looking. One time when I tell him not to, he holds me down and puts penis on my arm. I bite his shoulder, hard. He starts crying, pulls up his pants and runs upstairs to tell his mother that I bit him. I’m too embarrassed to tell anyone about the penis part, so they all just think I bit him for no reason.

I get in trouble first at the babysitter’s house, then later at home.

The next time the babysitter’s son tries to show me his penis, I don’t fight back because I don’t want to get in trouble.

One day I tell the babysitter what her son does, she tells me that he’s just a little boy, he doesn’t know…

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About Running Elk

My given native name, Running Elk, was bestowed in 2008 as I took my first steps as a fully fledged Medicine Man of the Zuni tradition. A most unlikely candidate for the role, my journey as a healer began some four years prior. The detour onto the shamanic way was most unexpected, yet has been one of the most rewarding challenges to date.
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8 Responses to Being A Girl: A Brief Personal History of Violence

  1. alienorajt says:

    Thank you for sharing this. It is harrowing to read. I felt as if I were frozen as each section sunk in. Much I can identify with. Ghastly. But so necessary to get out there. xxx

  2. Widdershins says:

    Every moment of every day of every year on every continent of the world … and they don’t get why we’re angry.

  3. Helen Jones says:

    I don’t like this post, although it was brilliant and harrowing to read. I do like that you shared it, and the comment you added. This is why we fight, and why we must continue to do so. I have a daughter and I do it for her, for myself, for all the daughters, everywhere.

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